ISN´T IT IRONIC?

Isn´t it ironic?

Wouldn´t life be easy without anxiety??

Couldn´t we just live life resolving everyday problems without the added pressure of anxiety over our heads?

I´d like to have my morning coffee, just once, without the crazy voice in my head telling me anxiety is on the way!!!

But no, some days it´s impossible to not listen to those voices. And yes, the anxiety creeps in, making itself comfortable to watch yet another episode of my disaster of a life.

I remember when it started, at the age of seventeen, while I was trying to iron dad´s clothes as best as possible (I´m such a crappy ironer). Mom was on the sofa looking at the news, oblivious that I was about to die. I had the horrible feeling of doom for the first time in my chest, my heart started pounding, sweat appeared like a tsunami all over my body…

“THIS IS IT, I´M DYING!”

The feeling overwhelmed me, leaving me paralysed and gasping for air. I looked at my mother and cried for help. “I´M HAVING A HEART ATTACK!”.

Mom knew exactly what was happening to me, she´d been there so many times.

Before I knew it, I was on the sofa, trying to breath through my nose and out my mouth; even the dogs thought it was amusing.

Mom turned to me and said the haunted phrase that would follow me forever: “You´re having a panic attack”.

- “A what attack????”

- “A panic attack. It will pass, but you need to calm down. You´ve been going through too much lately. Your body is stressed and it´s telling you it´s not okay”.

- “No shit! I´M DYING!! I´m too young to die…!”

That moment was the beginning of my mental decline. A before and after. I can´t say I remember life without anxiety, or the feeling of impending doom in my head.

It changed me forever, and made me the loose cannon ball I am today.

Could I have avoided it? Was it possible to just accept that anxiety happens and face it head on? Am I to live life in fear of panic attacks?

As all of us, I have no answered to these questions. What I DO have is the decision to go down with the ship or to just LAUGH IT OUT!

Because we all need a way out. And what better way to do it then laughing it out our nervous system?

Life can´t all be doom and gloom, right?

Right…???